Did harbhajan say maaki or monkey to Andrew Symonds?

Now the issue is whether Harbhajan Singh said maaki (in Hindi) or monkey (in English) to Andrew Symonds. To the casual reader, this issue might see very trivial and not worth the exposure it is getting. But, there is lot more to it than is visible on the surface.

Harbhajan had indeed referred to Symonds as a monkey, but he wasn't aware that this would be considered racist. So, his team of lawyers along with BCCI had decided to take the approach that Harbhajan had in fact referred to Symonds as a white monkey and not a black monkey, but the Indians didn't know how the australian legal team would twist the case to a racism abuse. So, for the past two days they were investigating alternatives for their defense.

This somehow leaked to the media and they started talking about it on television. One person who was watching this felt that he could help the Indian team in this situation. He was Javed Akhtar, the noted bollywood lyricist and scriptwriter. He felt that he could help because he was so much into writing rap crap in english for bollywood movies, that he could definitely could come up with some alibi in English for Harbhajan.

So, Javed Akhtar started searching for homonyms for monkey in English. The only one he could come up with was mucky. But mucky meant dirty and australians would consider this more offensive than monkey as they were known for maintaining cleanliness by covering all the dirt on their faces with sun-screen lotion.

Then, out of the blue, an idea struck him. Why not look for a homonym in hindi? It was much easier to form words out of the given syllables. So, the first word he got was makki, meaning a fly. But, he didn't want to use this, as he wanted to bring the australians down to earth and not on cloud nine like a fly. Javed was frustrated and the team working with him started swearing at Harbhajan, as he was the one responsible for all this mess.

Like all hindi speaking people, Javed started referring to all the relatives of Harbhajan as he started swearing. The moment he said "Saala Uske Maa Ki" , a BCCI member jumped up from his chair and shouted "Eureka, monkey mil gaya". Then, Javed realised what he had said and jumped up in joy.

Thus, the indian defense panel decided to use "Maa Ki" as an alibi. And the rest is history...Harbhajan was not charged with racism as swearing at one's mother or any other relative, in Australia was all in a day's work for their citizens.

QED.

Technorati Tags: harbhajan singh andrew symonds ricky ponting australian monkeys racism symonds monkey maanki maaki

Batch Renaming of files/photos in Windows XP

Though it was a pretty simple thing to do, I didn't know this until today. If you have a folder full of photos/files to be renamed in the same format, then Select All, right-click on the first file, Choose rename and then give the name you want e.g. Aphrodite trail.jpg. Press Enter. Then, automatically all the photos would be renamed in the same format e.g. Aphrodite trail(10).jpg and so on.

Are you better at English than the English?

Got this in an email today... I gave up in the middle.
If you are interested in the intricacies of English words, then watch out for War of the Words: The Queen's Challenge, which will be posted by this Friday.

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it's written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation's OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sleeve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.

Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.

Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.

Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.

Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.

Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.

Pronunciation -- think of Psyche!
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won't it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.

Finally, which rhymes with enough --
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?

Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!

Technorati Tags: funny english english language english english words

A visit to Avakas Gorge in Cyprus

Avakas Gorge is a much smaller cousin of the grand canyon though there is nothing that it not grand about this place. We have been there many times in the past. A few weeks back, we rented a jeep to travel to Akamas peninsula and our first stop was at Avakas Gorge. See more photos of avakas gorge on the cyprus blog.

Technorati Tags: cyprus avakas gorge avagas gorge paphos pafos cyprus adventure cyprus trek walk trail

Oh, you Australian Monkeys!

If Harbhajan Singh had called Andrew Symonds a monkey, was he being racist? This actually depends on which monkey he was referring to, when he was referring to Symonds as a monkey. Was he referring to the White Faced monkey or the Black Spider monkey? We may never know. One thing is sure. He wasn't definitely referring to Hanuman.

So, why does it matter which monkey he was referring to. When i think about this, I get doubts as to what racism actually means.

A standard definition of racism:

• The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others.
• Discrimination or prejudice based on race.

I am confused! So, if race is the main concern behind racism, why does calling an australian a monkey amount to racism? Race is often equated to colour and looks, as different races do look different from each other. So, if you say to a black person: "You blacks don't deserve any better" or if you say to a white person "You whites have got no brains", then this is racism, at least from my understanding of racism, because you are insulting a black based on his black colour and similarly for the whites.

So, if calling a australian a monkey is racism, does that mean australians have more in common with monkeys than rest of the human beings. So, referring to them as monkeys would be insulting them because of this unfortunate similarity (as seen below). So, it actually didn't matter whether Harbhajan was referring to either of the monkeys above, just calling him a monkey was enough. Case closed.

Not exactly. I am still confused. In fact, most of the Indians are confused. Indians are used to complaining against racism whichever part of the world they go. Indians are stuck between the so called whites and the blacks. Being white is considered superior in Europe and other western countries and being black is superior in Africa and other parts of the world, but where does that put us? We don't fit anywhere. In ayia napa here in Cyprus (supposedly the clubbing capital of the world), whites are welcomed for their cash and blacks are welcomed for their party-atmosphere creating capabilities, but we indians are considered good for computer-related jobs only. But,we have one advantage that the whites and blacks don't have. We can be racially discriminated against in the lands of both the whites and the blacks!

In my opinion, Indians are the most racist in the world. We practice racism on a day-to-day basis, the most prominent being the north india-south india divide. okay, the east indians also complain, but that is more of a geographical racsim, so we shall leave them aside. North Indians are fair and south indians are dark, so ? Actually, the only people who can "practice" such racism in India are the Kashmiris! They are fair! Everyone else in india is dark compared to them. When i joined BITS Pilani, there were many girls from Kashmir in my batch. They would have been the perfect candidates for "Fair and lovely" not the pyts from bollywood.

I started off with Australian monkeys and went on a totally different track to kashmiri beauties. I am confused!

Technorati Tags: harbhajan singh andrew symonds ricky ponting australian monkeys racism

Tata Nano and Hamara Bajaj Lite - The 1 Lakh small car

Okay, the bajaj one is more than 1 lakh, but it is targeting the same segment as the Tato Nano/Jeh. So, i guess that it is okay to bring them together.

Tata and Bajaj are making it easier for the common man to purchase a car now. When a bike costs 50,000 Rupees, who wouldn't like to go for a cosier option by paying another 50,000 rupees. This move by Tata and Bajaj has lot of implications:

• The Indian cities would now definitely feature of every edition of "The Amazing Race", "The crazy Race" or whatever new series the american channels can think of. Even now, it is fashionable for people to show a segment where a foreigner is shown driving on the Indian roads. Now with the Tata Nanos and Bajaj Lites replacing all the motorcycles, more mayhem is assured on our roads which translates into more dollars from all the foreign tv shows coming to India.
• It is said that 1 in every 5 mile of the highways in USA was built straight so that it could be used as a landing strip in times of war. The Indian government was very impressed by this concept that they "customised" it a bit and implemented here. On the Indian roads, 1 in every 5 km is pot-hole free so that people can use that part to stand on when the other sections gets filled up with water during excessive rains. The other 4 kms were designed so to stop any advancing armies which don't have the capabilities to negotiate such obstructions.
• With respect to the last sentence of the previous point, Pakistan and China have already placed orders for thousands of Tata Nanos and Bajaj Lites, which are cheap options for their armies to use when invading our country as these vehicles are built for Indian roads.
• Demand for land of a particular type has sky-rocketed after these announcements. No one even wants a petrol bunk to be allotted to them now. All of them are now crazy after allocation of parking lots, as soon, every tom, dick and harry in India will be driving around in small cars.

So, the small cars are not only stirring the Indian media, but the media of other countries are also getting interested. Tata and Bajaj, a good move!

Technorati Tags: tata nano Hamara bajaj lite small car 1 lakh car india india

Chakde India - The India Quiz Finals

If you haven't yet checked out the prelims questions of Chakde India Quiz, then you can do so at this link.

Posted below are the questions from the final. You can send in your answers to rajaram.sethuraman@gmail.com or if you have come here from a post on a quizzing forum, you can reply to my email on that forum.

1. The name of which Indian deity has made its way into the English language and has come to mean “a massive inexorable force or object that crushes whatever is in its path”? Ans: Juggernaut from Lord Jagannath
2. At which popular religious destination in India can you find Ram Jhula and Lakshman Jhula? Ans: Rishikesh
3. Which character in Hindu mythology got his name from his pot shaped head? Ans: Ghatotkacha
4. Which Indian musical instrument's name when translated into English means Royal Flute? Ans: Shehnai
5. What was the new lifeline introduced in Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC) 2 apart from the three which were already present? Ans: Flip the question
6. Who along with Batukeshwar Dutt was arrested in 1929 for throwing bombs in the Central Assembly at New Delhi? Ans: Bhagat Singh
7. Of what’s English translation is this the first line. “Thou art the ruler of the minds of all people, dispenser of India’s destiny” Ans: Jana Gana Mana
8. On March 16,2005, Ripudaman Singh Malik and Ajaib Singh Bagri, were found not guilty on all counts by a Canadian court. What crime were they accused of? Ans: Air India Kanishka Bombing
9. On 14th January every year, during the Makar Sankranti, what international festival is held at Ahmedabad? Ans: International Kite Festival
10. Oh, Creator of the universe! We meditate upon thy supreme splendor. May thy radiant power illuminate our intellects, destroy our sins, and guide us in the right direction." What is the significance of the above prayer? Ans: Gayatri Mantra
11. Identify the character. Ans: Shikari Shambu



12. Her mother's name is Bonnie Pandya, a Slovenian American. She is the second person of Slovenian descent to be sent to space. She apparently likes Samosas! Who? Ans: Sunita Williams
13. Originally introduced from India, it is the word for an open portico or light roofed gallery extending along the front of a dwelling or other building, and erected chiefly as a protection or shelter from the sun or rain. What word? Ans: Verandah
14. What started initially in 1984 between Esplanade and Bhavanipur, now covers a distance of 16.84 kilometers for Dumdum in the north to TollyGanj in the south? Ans: Kolkata Metro
15. Which famous jewel's name means "mountain of light"? Ans: Kohinoor
16. Kiron Kher had an unique credit in the titles of "Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge". For what? Ans: Credit for title-writing, as she suggested the title. “Title Suggested By”
17. What is full form of T.T.E as in the guy who checks the tickets on our trains. Ans: Travelling Ticket Examiner
18. In August 1990, in a test match between India and England at Manchester, Sachin won the man of the match award. He was presented the award by X. The next day, the Manchester Police issued a warning notice to X and also said that they would not consider this as a serious offense just because of the situation this time. What was the warning issued? Ans: A bottle was champagne was given as the man of the match award and sachin was a minor then. It is legally forbidden to give alcohol to a minor.
19. Jermaine Jackson, Dirk Benedict, Ian Watkins, Danielle Lloyd, Jack Tweed, Cleo Rocos, Jo O'Meara, Jade Goody, Carole Malone, Leo Sayer Day, Jackiey Budden, Ken Russell Day, Donny Tourette and? Ans: Shilpa Shetty (Big Brother Celebrity Series)
20. What does the W/L sign seen on Indian Railway tracks indicate? Ans: Whistle For level Crossing
    
21. Connect Pavo cristatus, Panthera Tigris, Mangifera indica and Nelumba nucifera. Ans: All are National Symbols. Peacock, Tiger, Mango and Lotus
22. Complete the list: Meenakshi Temple in Madurai, Brihadeshwara Temple in Thanjavur, Arunachaleshwara Temple in Tiruvannamalai, Golden Temple in Amritsar, Bahubali Gommateshwara Statue in Shravanabelagola, Mahabalipuram near Chennai, Lotus Temple in New Delhi, Ranakpur Jain Temple and _________. Ans: Taj Mahal. The list of all Indian monuments which appeared in the original list of the new seven wonders
23. What is the planet Rahu responsible for, according to Hindy Mythology? Ans: Responsible for causing Solar eclipses
24. Identify the product for which this print ad was prepared. Ans: Fevicol



25. This message from the Mumbai Police was put on something and placed randomly on the roads of Mumbai. What was it placed on? Ans: 1 Rupee coin





26. There are 5 of these labs at different locations. The largest lab consists of fourteen major geometric devices for measuring various parameters. Each is a fixed and 'focused' tool. The largest instrument here is 90 feet high and has its shadow carefully plotted. Its face is angled at 27 degrees, the latitude of Jaipur. The Accuracy of the largest instrument measuring time is about two seconds. Ans: Jantar Mantar
27. The proposed name for this institution was ‘Imperial university’ which was not selected. The Maharaja of Mysore laid the foundation stone in 1911. How do we know it today? Ans: Indian Institute of Science
28. When asked 'Why are you so sure that the first man, Adam, was an Indian?', he replied 'Who else will stand beside a naked woman and eat an apple?'. Who? Ans : Osho
29. In the Ramayana, Vishwamitra takes Rama and lakshmana with him to slay the demoness Tataka. During the course of the Journey, they often slept on the banks of Sarayu river. Vishvamitra did something to wake Rama up every morning before dawn so that he can do his rites. What did he do? Ans: He composed and sang the Suprabadam
30. According to the legends the Gods & Goddesses pleaded with Lord Brahma to create another 'Veda' which would be simpler for the common man to understand. Lord Brahma created the 'Panchamaveda', an essence of the four other vedas. It is believed he has taken 'Pathya'(words) from the 'Rigveda', 'Abhinaya' (gesture) from 'Samaveda' & 'Rasa'(sentiment & emotional element) from the 'Atharvaveda'. After creating this he gave it to Sage Bharatha & asked him to popularise this on Earth. What did this lead to? Ans: Bharatnatyam
31. What was carried in a third class compartment numbered 2949 to Triveni, Allahabad on February 12, 1948? Ans: Ashes of Gandhi
32. The members of the Muduvar tribe, which inhabits the mountain ranges around Valparai (Tamil Nadu) and Munnar (Kerala) in the Western Ghats, have a unique method for calculating their ages. What is it? Ans: They calculate their age with the blossoming of the Kurinji flower, which blooms only once every 12 years
33. Bulgar, Gansu, Taklamakan Desert, Kashgar, Kokand, Karakum Desert, Merv. Which music band? Ans: Silk Route
34. Who is missing? Ans: Zakir Hussain



35. In an economic times article which was talking about business and marketing opportunities in India, there was a statement “There are three main religions in India. Hinduism, Islam and ____”. Which was the third that they mentioned ? Ans: Cricket
36. What is the name given to the class of tourist trains modeled on the “Palace On Wheels” but meant to serve tourists with a budget? Ans: Village on Wheels
37. Manoj Singh Naruka became a celebrity (for the wrong reasons) last week because of his Orkut community. What was his community's name? Ans: I hate Mayawati
38. Which famous politician played the role of Santa Claus at Beur Jail in Patna during the Christmas celebrations in 1998? Ans: Laloo Yadav
39. In Hindi it is called Saunf what is it called in English? Ans: Fennel Seeds
40. It is the national game of Bangladesh, and the state game of Punjab and Andhra Pradesh in India. Ans: Kabaddi
41. Which company is the manufacturer of the 155mm FH-77 B howitzer artillery system?Ans: Bofors
42. Which tree takes its name from the caste of merchants who often conducted meetings under these trees in the marketplace?Ans: Banyan from Baniya

Special Topics: Cricket

1) Who was the vice-captain of the Indian cricket team for the twenty20 world cup? Ans: Yuvraj
2) What is the contribution of Paul Hawkins to the world of cricket? Ans: Hawk Eye
3) Amay Khurasia had an unique claim fame in the 1999 world cup held in England. What? Ans: Didn't play a single match

Special Topics: Indian Mythology

1) Ten warriors survived the Kurukshetra war. Satyaki, Yuyutsu, Ashwathama, Kritavarma,Kripacharya were five of them. Who were the other five? Ans: Pandavas
2) Who is on the Flag of Arjuna? Ans: Hanuman
3) The 100 Kaurava brothers had one sister. Name her!Ans: Dushala

Special Topics: History

1) Which company manufactured the rifles whose “greased” cartridges was one of the factors leading to the 1857 revolution? Ans: Enfield
2) Which Indian King was the first to use rockets in warfare? Ans: Tipu Sultan
3) Which famous Indian king was called Sandracottus by the Greeks? Ans: Chandragupta Maurya

Hope you enjoyed this quiz. You can find hundreds of other quizzes on my quiz page. If you want your quiz blog/site listed on that, just drop in a mail.

Technorati Tags: india quiz chakde india quiz blog quizzing website

Happy New Year 2008!